Jeff had to grin as the copilot came back into the cabin not five minutes after the plane leveled off. Wall to wall pussy, pal. Be a gentleman, and I'll let you look for a while. Look, but don't touch. Jeff admonished himself for his thoughts, but not much. He really couldn't blame the guy, though. There probably wasn't six females in a group on the planet that looked as good as these did.
Feeling sorry for him innocently trying to get a look, Jeff stood up and said, "You can have my seat. I need to talk a bit with the captain, anyway."
"Uh, no thanks, Sir. I was just going back to the restroom."
Oh, crap. He's actually blushing. Every female in the plane knows he came back here to see them. And he knows they know.
"Sit down," Jeff insisted, catching Kathy's eye. "The one beautiful woman you already have on this plane, plus the six I brought with me would do it to a dead man," he teased, not specifying what it was.
Jeff winked at Kathy and she turned away, obviously stifling a giggle. Grinning, he headed for the cockpit. He would bet the copilot would be in the bathroom jerking off long before they got to Georgia — probably several times.
Jeff stuck his head into the cockpit, "May I come in Captain?" At Captain Madison's motion toward the copilot's position, Jeff slid into the seat. "I appreciate your letting me come up here," Jeff responded.
"Ah, come on, Mr. Matthews, you've been in that seat before. I welcome your company. Besides," he added, grinning, "David was about to have a stroke to go back and talk with your ladies." Thinking for a moment, he added, "If he gets out of line, let me know and I'll come down on him, hard, Sir."
Jeff grinned back at the pilot. "My women might tease him a bit, but they will spank him if they think it's necessary. He's a nice guy, and they can pretty much overwhelm any male they want to." Shit why did I say, 'my women'. That's being a smart ass. I didn't mean to do that. "And how about forgetting that 'Sir' bit. I'm just Jeff."
"You've told me that before," Madison said checking his instruments and glancing at the radar, a little distracted. "But I guess those old habits die hard, and 'Sir' is a sign of respect, as you know. And I try to show respect for everyone that flies with us. If you insist, though, I'll try to remember. And," he grinned at Jeff, drawing the word out, "seems to me that I heard the word 'Captain' when you stuck your head through the door."
Jeff chuckled. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Those old habits do have a way of hanging in there."
They heard laughter from the back. "Sounds like Romeo just scored a point or two. Sure you don't want me to chase him out of there?" Madison joked.
Jeff laughed, glanced at Madison again. "Seriously, I thought I would talk to you about a couple of things while we had a little time together."
Madison nodded at the instrument panel and gave a little flick of his hand as if to indicate the aircraft. "Shoot. She practically flies herself. What's on your mind?"
"How much more weight could you take on?"
Madison grimaced, "Not much more, maybe a few hundred pounds. I noticed that your women didn't bring a lot of luggage, considering how many there are of them. Uh, I guess that didn't come out just like I meant it to..."
Jeff looked at Madison. "Come on, lighten up. Ever since those guys came to your house, you talk to me like I'm going to jump down your throat. Just because they're assholes, doesn't mean I'm one, too. My assistant is back there with her daughter; two are Arlene's friends, then my wife and daughter. There's a bunch of them, but they don't bite, and if they do, they have all had their shots," he laughed.
Madison was far from being an idiot, however. He just grinned at Jeff. "All had their shots, huh?"
It was Jeff's turn to bluster as the little dig came perilously close to the truth.
Madison took pity on him. "Enough bullshit. What can I do for you? How much weight are you talking about? We can always make another trip."
"Well I've got a bunch of guns — rifles, shotguns, handguns," Jeff blandly commented. When Madison didn't flinch, he went up a notch or two in Jeff's book. "They're one of my sideline jobs. Obviously, not as much now as they were when I was in college, and for the first couple of years after I started out in business. I have an FFL license. For awhile I bought and sold all sorts of guns to, primarily, police departments. Actually, I've gained more than just a little profit with the business; I've acquired several good friends. You would be surprised at how many cops really appreciate someone doing honest business with them. Seems like most of them have paid high dollar for their weapons. Many police departments still require their officers to furnish their own weapons, particularly the smaller departments. I even managed to make a few sales to some medium sized police departments when they decided to issue weapons to their officers."
Madison thought for a moment. "From your expression, I believe you thought I was going to get all freaked out when you mentioned guns. Actually, I like to go shooting whenever I get the chance. My wife gave me a Sig 226 in 9 mm, Christmas before last." He motioned to his left. "It stays in the plane when we're traveling, then goes home with me when I'm off. I shot a bit in the Air Force, but got some real training when I got out. I'll never be a competition shooter, but I've had a lot of good, safe fun with that present. I personally think that if more honest citizens carried guns, or at least had one at home, and had good training, there would be a whole lot fewer criminals preying on the public. It doesn't take much courage to break into someone's house at night if you know the homeowner isn't armed. It's a whole other ball game when the homeowner is armed and knows how to use a good weapon."
Pausing for a moment, he continued, "Sorry, I guess I got on my favorite soapbox. Back to your question. We're too near our weight limit this trip, but I can come back whenever you like, pending the aircraft not being reserved for the top five, as you know. Just give me a copy of your FFL license, and clear everything with the airports before you get there, or we'll be knee-deep in red tape. Since 911, they will strain a gnat and swallow a camel, unless they're expecting you. Just tell Kathy to make a couple of copies of your license. There's a small copy machine in the back."
Jeff found the control and eased his seat back a bit, giving his long legs a little more room. "I've got a buddy that owns a shop in Atlanta, I may just load them up — most of them are in their original boxes — and let him ship them to Boulder for me. I mentioned it to a dealer there, but he didn't seem too interested. I don't mind giving him a little incentive, but I think the guy is basically a prick. I guess I'll just have to check around a little more."
Madison raised his hand slightly, and Jeff waited while the pilot apparently listened to radio traffic on his earphone. "We're going to have a little bit of a bumpy ride for an hour or so," he said positioning the mike. After he made the seatbelt announcement, he noticed Jeff grinning. "What's with the grin?"
"My assistant does not like to fly. And that's if the ride is as smooth as glass. She's not going to be pleased."
"We have some motion sickness pills, if that will help."
Jeff shrugged. "I wish they would, but she doesn't get motion sick. She's going to be making several trips for the company we're starting. I'm beginning to think that I might just have to make the trips myself, after all. I really hate to make her miserable. She just seems to prefer having both feet planted firmly on the ground."
"Sounds like me when I ride in a car with my wife," Madison said, chuckling.
Changing the subject, Jeff said, "When are you guys going to take me up on my offer of spending a day or two with us?"
"Oh, has the dinner invitation changed into a 'day or two?'"
"It sure has. And if you like to shoot, I found a skeet thrower in the basement. There is sure plenty of room on that mountain to set it up. I have a couple of nice skeet guns in Georgia. I've got tons of targets that I used to sell to police departments. I can pick up a few boxes of clay pigeons. We could have a ball with the shotguns, and give your Sig a workout, too. You can shoot any of my guns, as well. It would be a lot of good fun."
"Have you taught your women to shoot?" Madison said without thinking. When Jeff didn't immediately answer, Madison started to apologize, but Jeff interrupted him.
"Is it that obvious?"
"Look Jeff, it was just a slip of the tongue. I meant your wife and daughter."
"Don't ever take up selling used cars, Bill. You'll starve to death."
"Jeff, I didn't mean..."
"I'm not mad, at least not at you. And yeah, you did mean it, even if it did just slip out. It slipped out because it is, apparently, so damned obvious. And I need to correct that, so tell me what you spotted before I get in a world of shit because of it."
Madison sighed. "Okay. It's the way they look at you, and you at them. Oh, I don't mean mooning over each other or anything. I could tell by the time everyone had given their bags to us and had gotten on board. It's not as if they're afraid of you or anything, they just follow you with their eyes a little more than is normal, and you do the same. It's a subtle thing, and I'm having a hard time putting it into words. But I think a lot of people will know very quickly if they see you guys together for any length of time."
Jeff sighed. "How many of them do you think are mine?"
"Why all of them of course," Madison instantly replied.
Jeff grimaced. Shit!
Captain Madison had two SUVs waiting. By the time Kathy had the door open, the SUVs were backing toward the plane. The two guys that brought the vehicles out were surly and were overly anxious to get back to whatever they had been doing. Assholes, you just missed more tip money than you'll get for the next two weeks, Jeff fumed to himself.
Diana nodded at the two as they strolled off. "With their attitudes, did they expect you to tip them?"
Jeff put the two fifty-dollar bills that he was going to use for tips back into his billfold. "I don't think they even expected a tip. If they always act like they just did, they probably aren't used to getting any kind of gratuity. Oh, well. Screw those guys. It's getting late. We sure want to get there before people start thinking about going to bed."
"It's only eight. Thirty minutes to get to Jennie's house. Even people in Georgia don't go to bed that early."
Jeff grinned a bit, even though he was definitely uptight. "After we talk to Jennie's mother and dad, then we have to do the same at Melissa's house, don't forget. No telling how late it will be by then."
Slamming the hatch after the last bag was in, he turned for the front. Diana grabbed his hand, then the back of his neck with the other hand. Pulling him down to her, she kissed him hard. "Remember, Baby, turn on the Alpha Male. Laura tells me it came out full force at the lab. Put on your mission face and do it."
"Mission face?" he asked putting his arms around her lower back and hugging her to him.
"Don't play innocent. You know exactly what I mean. It's hard to argue with that face, believe me, I've tried for years."
Kissing her again, he said, "You always surprise me, Baby. It's nice to know that someone as smart as you still married me."
"Get a room," Melissa yelled out the window, everybody cracking up. Jeff didn't care; he kissed her again. "See you at Jennie's house." He swatted her on the rear as she took off for the other vehicle.
Diana got under the wheel of the second SUV, smiling. Whatever happens, Big Boy, you're going to get sooo lucky tonight.
As they pulled up in front of Jennie's house and got out, Melissa said, "Hey, that's our car in the drive."
Jeff wasn't sure he wanted to confront both sets of parents at the same time.
Jennie led them to the side door. "If we have company, we always hang out in the den. This is the closest way," she said, removing her key from her purse.
One last, short regroup at the door and they walked in.
Oh, well. The first military precept is that the best plans only last until the first shot is fired. Plan change!
The lights were low in the den. Jennie's dad was between his fifteen-year-old daughter's legs, pounding away. Jennie's fifteen-year-old brother had Melissa's mother on all fours and hadn't even noticed that there was a sudden addition of seven more people in the den. Jennie's mother was playing cowgirl on Melissa's dad's lap.
Diana's camera began flashing. Jeff snapped the lights on. There were gasps and curses coming from all over the room, accompanied by a mad scramble for clothing. Jennie had to tap her dad on the shoulder twice before he noticed that anything was happening.
Finally, Jeff yelled in a parade ground voice: "SHUT UP! SIT DOWN!" Pointing to each of the parents, he continued in a much quieter, but still very stern voice, "You, you, you and you, sit on the couch!" They meekly did.
Pointing to the kids then, he said, "Go to the kitchen. Wait there. DO NOTCALL ANYONE ON THE PHONE. IF THE PHONE RINGS, DO NOTANSWER IT. IF SOMEONE COMES TO THE DOOR, DO NOT ANSWER IT. Do you both understand me?"
They definitely did, and took off.
Negotiations for Jennie and Melissa to move to Colorado went very smoothly — as did their power of attorney. Mainly Jeff told the parents what was going to happen and they instantly agreed.
Four hours later, they were sitting in a big suite in a luxury hotel in Atlanta. Both SUVs were packed to the gills with Jennie's and Melissa's things that they just couldn't live without. Jeff sat slumped on the couch, looking like he had just lost his last friend.
Everyone had tried to console him. Diana eased into his lap, putting her head on his shoulder. Kissing him, she quietly said, "I know how you feel. We all do. But you never threatened them. You even told them that we had come out to ask if Jennie and Melissa could live with us. You can let them know that they can come to visit the girls with tickets paid for by us, and all the rest you were going to offer them, later. You're beating yourself up over something they did, not you."
"Yeah," Jeff said, "but what you're leaving out is that they thought I was going to turn them over to the cops. They were positive of it. They thought I wouldn't do that if they let the girls live with us." Sighing, he whispered, "I feel like a total shit. They weren't doing anything that I haven't done. But Baby," he teased, kissing her lightly on the lips, "the camera was absolutely brilliant, as I've said at least a dozen times." Looking at the laptop where a crystal-clear picture of Jennie's dad and sister was still on the screen, "I just can't believe that you had presence of mind enough to snatch the camera out of your purse and start shooting. I would never have thought of it in time."
Diana knew he was giving her a lot of undue credit, but she enjoyed hearing it, anyway. "Well," she laughed, "I sure did snatch it out, all right. My stuff was all over the floor, and my cigarettes got stepped on."
"I forgot to stop and pick some more up. I'll run down to the lobby and get you a pack. I really don't know if they have twenty-four hour room service or not."
"Hush, Baby. I don't need any cigarettes tonight. We'll do that tomorrow. Go get a quick shower and we'll see if we can't get rid of some of your tensions."
Arlene, Melissa and Jennie had gone off to bed. A few minutes later, Ann and Laura took turns riding Jeff while Diana caressed his balls and used her vibrator.
Diana turned the light off and snuggled to her husband's left side as Laura had already done on the right. Ann snuggled up against her mother, putting an arm across Laura to touch Jeff. Diana's last thought before sleep overtook her was that she was glad Jeff had vetoed sleeping in their old house tonight. She would deal with a musty house, packing their stuff for the movers, and the decisions that would arise on the morrow. Sleep came quicky on the heels of their mutual exhaustion.
Two weeks later, after bribes to expedite things, called in favors, and lawyers, Jeff and Diana had powers of attorney for Jennie and Melissa.
Jeff and Diana decided to let the moving company pack everything from Laura's and their house that they wanted to keep, then gave the rest to friends and family. Jeff's lab equipment was also carefully packed, and everything eventually sent on its way. The moving company knew that everything would have to be offloaded into smaller trucks to negotiate their drive, and planned to do that at their Denver office. Money had taken care of all their original objections.
Finally, with everyone exhausted, but jubilant, they flew back into Boulder to pick up their vehicles and finish their journey home.
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